This is the place to get it all out! Tell us what's on your mind. What's the worst thing you've done for your addiction? What's the worst thing that's happened to you because of your addiction? How have you been affected because of someone else's addiction? How has your life as an addict affected the ones you love? Reading and writing these confessions help us realize the impact that the addictions have over all of us. When posting your confession, you can choose to remain anonymous or let others see your profile name as to bring about discussions.
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Mike
I found out at my Nar-Anon meeting that one of our members died suddenly this past week of a heart attack. He was 63 and his name was Mike.
We might never have known about it, except someone from the group saw his picture with his obituary. You see, we never knew his last name because the program is anonymous. We found out that the man we knew as just Mike held a law degree and a psychology degree. He graduated first in his class. He was married and had two daughters, three grandkids. He did extensive volunteer work in our community. His "guestbook" on the funeral home website had over 10 pages of tributes from family, friends, and co-workers. I never knew any of these aspects of his life. All I knew was that his name was Mike, his daughter was his addict, he was my friend, and I loved him.
Posted: 02/15/2015 8:22 PM
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Can't get over feeling stressed
Posted: 02/08/2015 11:14 AM
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Just feel like talking
Sorry to hear of all the injuries happening and hope everyone is on the mend.
Got a call from my son in law a couple of weeks ago asking if he could give my phone number to the mother of his friend. Apparently this young man has become addicted to heroin and has finally reached the point of asking for some help from his family and friends. My first thought is for my son in law to please stay away from him but the guy lives 300 miles away so am pretty safe in that area.... I hope. I asked if he was using when my son in law used to hang out with him and was told no, that back then he told my SIL how stupid he was for even trying it. That was 6-7 years ago. The guys family was very close to my SIL during his childhood, they were neighbors and would always give my SIL a place to go when his parents wigged out. They all knew of my SIL addiction because both of their sons were his best friends growing up and when he finally sought help both of the boys were there for support...they were the only guys he knew that didn't use. Both my daughter and son inlaw said they cried (literally) for this family when they heard the news...they know the battle ahead for everyone. The whole family knows of the turn around my SIL has made in his life and for the past several weeks everyone in the family, including the addict, has been calling asking him for advice. I think he is a bit overwhelmed with it all and that is why he gave the mom my phone number. She still has not called me and I am sure she is feeling the sadness and shame that we all feel when we first hear the news. She thinks of the stigma of heroin and has yet to realize there are so many of us out there who have been or are in her/their shoes. I know they have been told about Naranon/alanon but don't know if they have attended.
I think my SIL has really been impacted by all this because this time he is on the other side of the fence and not only sees the pain of his friends family but is experiencing that pain himself...feeling helpless and knowing that his friend has to do it himself.
Just felt like talking to someone and you guys are it when it comes to the addiction aspect of my life. I know I don't have to ask for prayers cuz all of us here always say them for everyone involved with the disease of addiction. Thanks for being here...still...after all these years. Thanks to Matt for keeping it up and running.
Posted: 02/07/2015 1:29 PM
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Update
Last September, I caught my 25 year old son huffing in my home. We had some pretty serious drama at which time he was told to get help or get out. His gun has been locked in my safe ever since and he has had the good sense not to ask for it back. He has held onto his job. He has a girlfriend. And he has done everything little thing I asked since my knee surgery. Just for today, things are good.
Posted: 02/07/2015 7:07 AM
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Been busy with ME
I've been dealing with injured knee since the first week in December. Had surgery a week ago, got my stitches out today. Hopefully rehab next week and then back to work. Pain meds make me itch and nauseous so I've been pretty miserable but a little better each day. Been too busy to notice how my son is doing. Seems to be okay for today. Hope everybody is keeping warm.
Posted: 02/05/2015 7:06 PM
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Back Up Again
Just to let some of you that know me , im back on track once again , moved to onother City to get away from all the crap , I'm sharing a house with a 74 year old man $ 400 a month and help him out with choirs since he had a hip injury and have known him for quite sometime , im happy here no stress . Stiil fighting the system but staying strong God is Good .
Dog The Addict .
Never Give Up , Love your Addict. Posted: 01/28/2015 7:16 AM
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My New Life (Update)
My New Life (Update)
Several months ago I finally made a hard stand against what was happening in my life with AD. I changed my phone number and blocked all communication. He spent his birthday & Christmas without his family & that was really hard but the other kids are struggling with everything that has happened..one of my twins is in counseling mostly because of it. It was very quiet for a few weeks and then we heard from him about 3 weeks ago.
He has a job! And an apartment! He is working for an investment group who own 3 restaurants and AD waits tables and is assistant manager for one of the restaurants. He has been attending regular AA meetings as he has been seen there by my other son's friend. He is volunteering at the local humane society shelter a couple of times a month. He is also starting his own business, a college writing service that I help him with (He is an excellent writer). He says he needs to keep busy...he also started a payment plan with the court to pay off all court fines. I have been able to verify the job & apartment & we are working on the writing projects together via email.
The best part is that he has not asked us for a cent. He seems proud of what he has accomplished pointing out that 3 months ago he was just out of jail and homeless. He is talking so much better too- Acknowledging that he is a 28 year old man and he needs to start & handle his own life. He has plans to try & go back to school to finish his degree once the court fees are done. He said he is just seeking an equilibrium now ..he seems so much more realistic.
So things are better. We have allowed him to come over once..he spent the night & we dropped him off to work the next morning. No fights..no drama. I told him we can do this sometimes on his day off as we really enjoy his company when he in active recovery. I am being cautious..I have not given him my new phone number..We are in contact through Facebook which I can block quickly. Now the test is if he can sustain this..so far, so good...but he has shown what he could be and that he can do it if he wants to. It's been a good beginning to the year..I pray we end it the same way..
Posted: 01/23/2015 3:28 PM
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This is so true
Posted: 01/08/2015 5:18 AM
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new challanges
Since i have been out of prison , nothing went accordingly of what i had hoped to accomplish . My 1st Full ssi check was garnished from the Governments student loan , of the sum of $ 289 . which threw me of the budget but have been n contact with the student loan Hardship program , then found out that my Medicare will be reinstated in July , or pay Almost $ 3000 in rearage and finds to be reansted . The IRS after my A_ _ . So i wrote to them i sent my income Statement waiting to hear from them .And not having a way to get to Social Security in person to have my card replaced . Under allot of stress , my thoughts going the wrong way , thinking i need some drugs to get some relief from all this . But Still Hanging on . Not Giving in to the thought for my own sake. IM sorry had to vent . Everyday has been a challenge for me when i think everything is ok i step backwards . But I Should Be Thankful it Has Not Made So Weak To Use .
Dog The Addict
PS. I know that i make this crap , sound like is the end of the road .
Thinking That there is more serious things in this world , that someone would consider my problem is no problem. And i would agree IM still breathing.
God Bless Posted: 12/30/2014 6:12 AM
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heroin and what it has done
hekko all. I pray that you all had a Merry Christmas. I was doing very well enjoying the season until Christmas Day. I cried ran to the bathroon to shiekd myself from my 5 year old and I saw almost as though it were happening at that moment my AD oding on the floor. It set me off further. I of course got it together for the sake of my other family but I am toired of ignoring what ahppened. My hubby has not been supportive in the emotional areas but supportive of getting AD out of house last year. She will be gone a year in Feb. I have mad a trip last monthy to see her in prison. She did look beautiful. She has since been kicked out of the rehab program in jail due to her " negative influencce on others" that is 2 down. I am so tired of things. I am trying to be supportive of the positive. She has maintained a sponsor even though she was booted out of rehab. I try so hard to focus on the good, but it is work. I just want to rest. I want my mind to stop, my lungs to breath and my heart to beat normal. I do not want to "flash back: to Christmas eve when I hear a siren or see flashing lights. I am tired Posted: 12/27/2014 10:24 AM
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SITE SUPTR
SITE SUPTR
SITE SUPTR