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Passing a urine test while on meth

How easy is it (or is it possible) to pass a UA while still doing meth?  I'm asking because my husband (who is in a very loosely run outpatient program, and now is in "phase 2" of the program where he only goes to the treatment center 1x a week and to meetings on his own 4x a week) seems to be seriously irrational, angry, hostile and like he was acting when he was on meth.  But he says that "he passed the UA" and is clean.  I would bet anything that he's not.  Or is it that meth lingers on in one's attitudes like this three months after supposed sobriety???  I did notice today, however, that he's gaining a great deal of weight, which doesn't correlate to meth (he'd lost 40 lbs. in a month when he was doing it before) and he was sweating profusely in a well air conditioned office.  Any thoughts? (please) 

Posted: 08/10/2010 12:04 AM

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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

 I did look up something on meth last night and it said that not all meth addicts lose weight.........most but not all.  True?

I'm somewhat desperate for any feedback........my husband and I sat through a pre-arranged marriage counseling session yesterday from 4:30-5:30, in which he behaved completely irrational (yelling, swearing, agitated, etc.).......not only to me, but more importantly or significantly to the therapist.  Not once did he mention what I was going to come home to.   At 6:45, just as I was heading out the door to go to an Alanon meeting, a Sheriff's Officer arrived at my front door to serve me with divorce papers.  I felt like I'd been hit directly on the head with a boulder.  He is also asking for sole custody of our 8 year old son!  He's currently on a mental health "stay of commitment" and in treatment for meth and living at a hotel.......how could a rational man possibly think that this is appropriate???  

Posted: 08/10/2010 7:24 AM

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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

Hi Valerie,

I am so sorry you are going through this.   I wish I had some advice to give.  :-(    

I can only imagine the pain and disbelief you are going through.  Any new develops?

Posted: 08/10/2010 2:29 PM

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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

I don't get why he is bothering with marriage counseling when he knew he was filing for divorce. I also don't understand how he could even begin to think that he could get sole custody when he is a recovering addict and living in a hotel?

Posted: 08/10/2010 3:23 PM

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SOBER COACH
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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

WoW Valerie, Im so sorry whats going on but rarely does a man get sole custody unless there is something wrong with the mother and u seem totally like a great mom, so i wouldnt sweat that stuff, he couldnt be raising your son on his own. Do u think he has met someone else thus the reason he wants a divorce? I would ask him if u on talking terms , this is all about u and your son, he is struggling for his life and your son would not be in a good place with him and Im sure the judge would agree, i hope u are and have been keeping a journel about all this and whats been going on if not start one and make LOTS OF NOTES, u need to be prepared for the fight of your life and we are all here rooting for u, we love you Valerie and all our prayers and good intentions sent your way HAS to help, much love, nikky

Posted: 08/10/2010 4:06 PM

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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

I hope I am wrong but you probably are right he probably isn't clean.  The weight gain is really the only thing that doesn't fit.  The sweating and the angry and hostile attitude spells trouble.  From my own experience go with your gut feelings on this one.

 

Posted: 08/10/2010 4:22 PM

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Attorneys will ultimately do what the client asks them to, even if they have advised the client against it, and based on what you’ve told me the most he will get is visitation… and if he’s using he’ll get supervised visitation if that. Have you talked to him since you were served? I’m so sorry Val. I’m coming to the realization that this is just a viscous cycle that will never end and I don’t know about you, but even if Roger cleans his act up, I don’t think I have the energy to deal with it down the road, over and over again… or to put my kids through it. I don’t understand why he would have bothered continuing with the marriage counseling up to the last minute. I know this horrible feeling, that even though you didn’t cause the problem you have to go through this. And even though you see the man he has become, you desperately miss the man you remember. I think we are going to both have to just figure out how we are going to move forward without ours husbands. We need a partner and they are never going to be a partner. We deserve a husband, and they are not husbands anymore. A husband is the closest friend you've ever had and he is supposed to be there by your side and share in your dreams and help them to come true. I’m so sorry he did this and that you have to go through this, but I don’t think custody of your son will be an issue. He has proven his ability as a father and a husband. And Nikky is right... you need to keep very detailed notes of everything. You think you will remember, but you don't... not every detail. I'm here for you if you need to talk.

Posted: 08/10/2010 6:25 PM

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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

 Hi Maggie.....

I have an attorney that is reviewing everything right now.  Our son is not spending any custodial time with his father currently, I have temporary sole custody (husband is in a hotel, in treatment, and on a "stay of commitment" by the County for mental health reasons......deemed "mentally ill" until a 6 mo. review is conducted in 12/10)  Supervised visitation was allowed, and we have a Guardian ad Litem that agreed somewhere along the road that I could take our son to be with his dad unsupervised "because he's doing so well in treatment"......I strongly disagree, but was going along with it, even let him stay overnight at the hotel with him one weekend night.  Then he started acting completely irrational last week (in front of a marriage therapist thankfully), so I put the brakes on any unsupervised time until he seems better, and that was before he served me with divorce papers.  But of course he is telling the Guardian ad Litem that I'm just angry about the divorce and withholding parenting time.  He is an ex cop (has been retired for 6+ years) and fortunately, the town he served in is not in the county we live in or will be divorced in.  I know.......this is ramping up to be bad.  I was NOT expecting this at all, not now anyway.

Posted: 08/13/2010 2:47 PM

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In Response to: Passing a urine test while on meth

 Thanks Maggie.  I trust in what you and others say, and in my head know it to be true (that things will be okay/better again one day), as I've been divorced before many years ago.  Right now it certainly doesn't feel like it, however, quite the opposite actually.  May I ask, did your ex stay sober?  Were you devastated like I am now?  I feel like a walking bag of raw nerves, nearly hyperventilating to breathe, and look and feel like I've aged 20 years in the past 4-5 months.  It seems like I was just beginning to get past the shock of him doing all that he'd done and abandoning us for the BIGGEST meth binge I've heard of (and while he was on that binge he scared the crap out of me and everyone I know.....I think he was very near actually killing me actually in his psychosis).......and now I have the divorce he's filed for to shock me yet again.  I had GMAC go ahead and repossess his truck that I'd been making payments on with my own money from my 401k and was letting him use (it's actually owned by my company, and now technically the bank until this is all worked out) on Wednesday and now that he's made it abundantly clear that he's not "coming home" I'm starting to clear out his personal belongings and part of me feels like these are forward moving steps, as sad as they are.  

Again, thanks for your kind words........it means a lot.

Posted: 08/13/2010 5:36 PM

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SOBER COACH
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Very well put Maggie, i ditto that one, u are georgous and u will do just fine without that drama in your life, like u said his crap has aged u, its your choice if u continue to let HIM... Now its your turn to take your life back into your own hands and fight for whats YOURS... I am so proud of you for reaching out for help Val, this site has saved me through my tough time and Im hoping its helping all of us with our individual issues... My prayers are with u Val :-) Nikky

Posted: 08/13/2010 8:24 PM

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