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About Me

I have been dating my girlfriend for about 6 months.  I've known her for probably ten years or better.  She has already gone through rehab for cocaine which was an inpatient program.  We started dating just before she hit bottom, well at least I thought.  She asked me to take her to detox.  I never realized how hard it is to get someone into detox who wants to go voluntarily.  She went through an outpatient program with half a heart I would say.  That brings us to current that she is relapsing  and I'm not in her life right now.  I haven't heard from her in nearly three weeks and I haven't tried to contact her, either.  I'm trying very hard to get on with my life and take care of myself.  I'm attending alanon meetings which have helped me in so many ways that I can't even list them.  My girlfriend and I are very much alike in so many ways.  I have thought that sometimes it is like looking in a mirror.  We mirror each other with the good and the bad.  I think that the biggest thing that I've learned about myself is that I'm a "fixer" in all phazes of my life.  I can't fix my girlfriend and I'm having a hard time accepting that fact.  I'm now trying to live my life without "fixing" everyone and only concentrating on "fixing" myself.