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About Me

 I am a 33yr old mother of  1 10yr old daughter.Her dad & I have been together for 12yrs,but are not married.I started smoking pot when I was 15yrs old & it continued clear thru High School & beyond.I wasn't much of a drinker until I turned 21.I didn't think I would have a problem w alcohol,but once again was I wrong.My friend & I were out 5 nights a wk.Started to notice I wasn't able to have just a few & go home.I was getting extremly intoxicated every time we were out.When I got pregnant w my daughter all of that stopped.Once she was born,back at it 1mnth later.That lasted 3 more yrs.Instead of 5 nights a wk,it was only once on the wknd,but of course the binge drinking continued.My boyfriend told me I needed to talk to my Dr. since I didn't think there was a problem,bcuz I was only drinking 1 night a wk.Well my Dr. confirmed that I was a binge drinker & I need to put an end to it b4 it becomes a big problem.So that's what I did.The rx diet pills took the place of that.I was addicted to those for 4yrs.Even though I lost 130lbs,I had become a differant person,sum1 I didn't know.Once I got off of those, the rx pain pills took there place.That battle went on for 3yrs.I would have to say that they were the most  destructive of all.I hit rock bottem when I had started to crush & snort them.Most of my dealers were arressted in the same drug bust.Istarted to panic,wondering where I was gonna get what I needed now.That's when I hit the absolute low.Pretending to be my mom,I called her Dr. & asked for somthing for knee pain.Three rx's later,the Pharm,who is good friends w my mom knew sumthin was up.BUSTED!!!!!!!The Pharm already knew I had a problem w these from all the Dr. shopping b4.They obviously have to file a report w the police when sum1 does this.My mom refused to fill out a statement against me,told the cops that she would rather see me get help then go to prison.No charges filed,all was dropped.My mom told me that's the only chance I got & I better get to work on getting better.We tried to get me into many rehabs,but she had co-signed for my older brother to many times that nothing worked.Have never been to rehab,but have managed to stay clean w out a substitute for 3.5 mnths now.Hasn't been easy at all,but trying like hell everyday.