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Hi! Yes I'm still here. Still in the same place with AD...but have moved on with the rest of my life. He's still playing the same games, same manipulations, same dysfunctions. I no longer refer to his relapses but my own as I can be going along just fine & have a day where I still obsess over that of which I have no control. My other 3 are growing into fabulous adults and they are a United front when it comes to all of this. 

I could tell stories but there isn't a point to that. He did recently go on a tirade when he found out his brother was working in the same city as him and so AD had to quit his "two jobs" because of this infiltration from his horrible family.Even the other addicts on his Facebook told him he was a whiny attention-seeker who needed to cut the crap. He takes them for what he can as well. 

About a month ago I did go and meet with him and it was an unmitigated disaster that ended in me driving him to hospital psych and calling security to meet me at the door. That was my relapse..it accomplished nothing but the payoff that he can still get mom to run out there even if it will do no good. He had written a suicide note to my 86 year old father in law who just suddenly lost a son and he had just lost his step grandson to addiction & suicide. So my AD, true to form, swoops in to cash in. He told grandpa to pay up or he would be responsible for his death, a note I used to get on a daily basis. This angered me & shook me up. AD is a masterful escalator..

But, I persevere...numb in some ways but ok. I am working on my own health trying some new strategies - determined to get stronger in every way possible. I find a great help to me is Valerie Silviera, founder of Addicts Family. Look into her work & sign up for her battle reminders. She just lost her addict daughter at the end of August, but she has been writing about it at least 10 years.

Stay Gold!

Posted: 10/13/2016 9:08 AM

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Posted: 10/13/2016 9:29 AM

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Dyanne, Good work! and thanks for the update.  It feels lonely here these days...I miss the banter..

Cathy

Posted: 10/13/2016 11:43 PM

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Me too Cathy! Where is everybody? 

Posted: 10/15/2016 1:32 PM

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I have not spoken to my Ad in a couple months, she never calls except for money, which I say 'no" to her. my phone rang this morning early in the A.M. I froze as I thought it was THEE call. She is back in county jail, on a 16 thousand dollar bond. I will not get her out, as she will surly be dead if she gets out. she called and I listened to her lstory of misfortunate events that were not her fault, quickly shut her down and said NO to all of her semands. Please pray as she goes through detox in there the next few days. Hang in there lasy, prayers for you as well

Posted: 11/06/2016 6:50 PM

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I've had some hard times in my life (alcoholic family), but my son's problems are the WORST EVER.  I am with you all and so hoping that ... some day we will have seen tremendous progress.  My son claims he hasn't smoked marijuana in 24 hours.  He acknowledged that for almost 20 years the first thing he did in the morning and the last thing he did at night was get high.  Apparently back in the day when he had friends, they used to brag to one another about how much, how often and so on.  Isn't life hard enough w/o looking for failure and despair?

Posted: 11/20/2016 6:47 PM

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