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He's on methadone maintenance but uses other drugs illegally

Hello,

I'm in so much pain in my relationship with boyfriend. He's on methadone maintenance but uses other drugs like adderall and Xanax and ambien and weed without a prescription. He does it all behind my back with people he keeps separate from me and tells me it's ok because he's not addicted to THOSE drugs, they're just recreational. He's a very attractive charming character around others and when we first met of course. But he treats me like **** now and spins it all around when we break up which happens every other week like it's all my fault .. I don't know who the crazy one is anymore. I feel really guilty and like a bad person because I've become a monster toward him since I feel totally on the defense all the time. I can't convince him that life doesn't have to be this way. He won't go to meetings and I want to start going. I've been with him 2.5 years and this was all going on before me. I didn't know what I was getting myself into. He sold me on methadone maintenance being recovery and has no intention of coming off. I did not know he had other drugs he liked.  I've learned to accept the methadone  but I don't understand the other drugs and his behavior toward me? Is he relapsing or simply a jerk or both? Also he flirts with other women on Facebook and this hurts, he's an attention *****. I don't think he's cheated physically but I can't trust my judgement. I'm attracted to these types of men and I'm too old for this. We are in our late 30s... why can't we grow up? Also he doesn't have a steady job, drives recklessly, bums money off his dad and me. I am starting to slack off at my job too and I've always been pretty responsible. I'm very bitter and feel like I'm crazy like I'm the bad guy here. Well today I threatened to hurt myself because I felt hopeless and he didn't care because I told him he was a bad person and druggie. I shouldn't have said that but he really felt cold and I was trying to get his attention... but I don't think he cares really. I'm heartbroken and feel like I'm dying. I can't talk to people about it because they say just leave and call me stupid. I would leave if I could... I'm not stupid just addicted to him I guess. Can someone please provide direction and insight? He has no kids and I have an older daughter who I feel I've neglected in many ways even though she's in college and spreading her wings. I want to be a better person and mother still. I've only ever drank in my life socially not often and smoked pot a few times.

Posted: 07/01/2017 1:44 PM

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My husband is a crackhead

Basically, my husband has developed a crack addiction. He was a drinker before we got married and this wasnt a massive problem because he was only a binger however now he has replaced one problem with other. Me and my husband are muslims so any form of substance abuse is a big deal. 

My brother in law was away for a year with is own addictions and now he has come back on the scene he has devloped this addiction. My husband told me about this at the end of last year and i warned him that if he was to start hanging around with him, his habbits would rub off on him. My husband has a very addictive personality, with everything. Clothes, shoes, life style choices everything, so i was very worried about him getting mixed up with crack. 

We moved in with his mother as she was poorly so he was unable to drink as she has very strong religous veiws and would be very upset if she saw him drunk, instead now he goes out for hours with my brother in law smoking crack as when he gets in he can conceal been high and isnt making a fool of himself and isnt as obvous like if he was drunk.

7 years ago i was a different person, and my self to had a cociane addiction however, since ive found my faith i have had no problems and have been clean. Therefore, i see the signs and no when hes off his face and he cant lie and cover it up like he can to other people. 

He spends every penny he has on drugs, lies and sneaks around trying to cover it up. When i try and confrount him he just tells me im making him worse and wont let me speak about it. When i have managed too he tells me he knows hes wrong and he wants to stop. Hes been away for a few weeks on a religous holiday, which i thoigh would make him better, but as soon as he came home he went out and spent £100 in two hours on it.

He is in complete deniel, and im worried hes going to end up losing me and everything he has, himself included. I cant let my husband carry on this way but im worried that unless he addmits and wants to change there is nothing i can do.

 

Posted: 06/27/2017 7:25 AM

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Using or not?

My boyfriend was clean for a year and two months when I started noticing changes in him, it wasn't long before it ended and he was back to normal.

Two months later I caught him using. He's an IV dilaudid user. He admitted to me before when I began questioning him he was using this herbal medicine "kratum" which gave him the high feeling, he then took suboxone once he realized he was becoming addicted and had withdraws from it and stopped and never went back. So, his mind started going crazy and he started using again because he thought he could stop just as easily.. obviously he was wrong....

For the past 3 months he's been claiming to be clean and then I would catch him all over again.... he started taking methadone and would use ds in between.

now, we are going on a week clean.. or so he says...

his eyes were normal and not constricted a couple days but now they're back to being how they were.. tiny. He isn't nodding out and it's hard to tell whether the marks on his arm are fresh or not... they're red but not bruised and look like they may be healing  but I am clueless on the subject... and he said "if he was to shoot yo again it wouldn't be in his arm so I wouldn't know".

besides the pupils he's acting normal...I don't know if I'm over thinking things or not. He says they're small because he's tired and worked all day.... 

 

any advice ? Do you think he's using or am I just crazy??!

I literally am going crazy :(

 

Posted: 06/25/2017 1:26 PM

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New drugs?
Found in my house a gallon empty milk jug with a rigged metal Tube one top. Daughter says it was a bong. Also bottle of white distilled vinegar and apple cider vinegar. What is that used for in drug world?

Posted: 06/23/2017 3:23 PM

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Old or new hollow pen

I found a hollow pen the other day with brown resin in it.  It smells.  My son is a heroin addict and visited 2 years ago and again last month. Is there any way to determine how old this is?

Posted: 04/01/2017 10:31 AM

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LIFECOACH
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There is hope

i just wanted to say hi, I haven't been on for a while, I joined this site in 2009 I think, my daughter at that time was a hopeless IV heroin addict on her way to an early grave,  almost 8 years later she is about to graduate from New England college of Law. She also has a job lined up clerking for a judge after the bar exam. She works very hard to maintain her sobriety and advocates for this horrible disease, I was as lost as a parent as she was an addict. Back then, there was no hope, so I thought, I'm living proof, and here to tell you all no matter how far you have fallen, recovery is possible and people in recovery are everywhere just waiting to help.

Posted: 03/20/2017 6:26 PM

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Recovering from meth
Today makes 51 days that I have been officially clean. Meth was my last drug Of choice before deciding I had to make a change. My body is still feeling extremely out of whack and I'm hoping to find another woman that has gone through this that might be able to help me out with some of my questions and just someone to add to my support system.

Posted: 03/19/2017 8:26 AM

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My meth addicted husband says he wants a divorce

My husband, age 38, and I have been married for almost 15 years and have two wonder children (12 and 14, also special needs). We have a beautiful home, nice cars, a comfortable savings account, he has a very good job that pays around 150,000 a year. The downfall in his line of work is that it takes him away from home weeks at a time. Five days ago, I discovered his drug stash and he told me (only because I held the drug hostage away from the house) that it was meth. Claims he doesn't have a problem, that he's used drugs for years, he has a good job, etc. He left and went back to work then and I don't expect for him to come home again for another 3 to 4 weeks. Since he has been gone, he's texted and called and becomes extremely irrate when I mention talking about the meth situation. Yet, he continues to call and answer when I call. He has since moved 30,000 from our savings, and used an additional 6,000 to pay on his credit card debt. I've seen his statement so I recognize the charges and they all appear normal. I told his dad who told his older brother and they went to visit and talk with him on the fourth day after I found out. He was extremely upset, but managed to talk with them and denied having any problems that he could't handle. He is very angry with me for going to his dad and says he's tired of my snooping and meddling and wants a divorce. I love him very much, but I love the person he used to be, not the person he has become. My son, 12, says he hates him and he's not his dad. I've decided it is best if I take a step back and get out of his way. I am halfway through with my graduate degree, I have 1 1/2 years left. Should I expect him to follow through with the divorce? Should I get boxes and prepack the majority of his belongings? Or should I chalk it up to the drug and decide if I want to make a change in our lives or continue to live as we have done? Everything that I have read suggests that I should get out and not look back, but I haven't given up hope just yet. I'm not very good at tough love, but am desperately trying to just stay out of his way by not calling or texting or even answering all of his phone calls and texts. I suppose I have fears of abandonment and that I lack the strength to move on without him. What advice do you have for me and family?

Posted: 03/18/2017 12:51 PM

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Boyfriend Relapsed. How do I help him?

My Boyfriend had been clean for 8 months until a couple days ago when he relapsed. He is an amazing guy and treats me so well. I'm not ready to give up on him and leave him but I want him to realize that I am hurt and want him to get help, although I know he needs to want it. I have been ignoring his texts and calls all day after telling him I was hurt and needed some time, I dont want him to think that he can keep putting me through this and its going to be okay. But I also feel bad and want to be there for him, but I'm not sure what the right thing to do is right now. He had taken some of my pain pills I had from a kidney stone I had gotten a couple weeks ago. I know that he has actual pain, and he says he didnt take them to get high but that doesnt make it right in my eyes at all. Im just so confused and struggling with it all and need some advice. Do I continue to not talk with him for a few more days at least to get a point across?

Posted: 03/11/2017 8:14 PM

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waxy looking crack
Thinking I have been bumped with some wax looking,weird tasting hard crack,any clues to what it could be,blows loads of smoke

Posted: 02/13/2017 1:58 PM

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