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Confessions

This is the place to get it all out! Tell us what's on your mind. What's the worst thing you've done for your addiction? What's the worst thing that's happened to you because of your addiction? How have you been affected because of someone else's addiction? How has your life as an addict affected the ones you love? Reading and writing these confessions help us realize the impact that the addictions have over all of us. When posting your confession, you can choose to remain anonymous or let others see your profile name as to bring about discussions.

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AnnaleeLouise 14 Thanks

The love of my lifes overdose I left and moved all if my apartment furniture, clothes, almost everything out of the apartment. Police escorted out for protection. I was over the downers and uppers. I was over being mistreated. I was over being lied to. I was over being scared to lose my freedom. I was over worrying out his freedom. I was ready to get away from crack and morphine from the time I woke up to the time I went to sleep. I was over everything losing my mind. Emotionally distraught, emotionally hopeless. Exhausted from going through full body and mind painful withdrawals for nothing. I was tired of my neighbors that were crack abusers. I stayed gone for two weeks hardly having as much contact with him. He sent me a picture of him going to kill himself. I called and called no answer. I threatened an ambulance, or the police, no answer. I told him I called them and made a report when I hadn't yet, no answer. Instantly I knew something was wrong. I called 911 and gave them our apartment address "Grainger Ave Knoxville Tennessee" explained he had purposly overdosed, I just knew. I emotionally could feel it, I knew something was drastically wrong. The police officer assisted me on the phone he mentioned our green truck was outside, the door was locked, and only the light of the television was on in our apartment. He said he did not have enough evidence to break in the door. I then panicked and knew he had overdosed. I explained to them my concerns he told me my only option was to use my key to get into the apartment. So at three in the morning I rushed to Broadway. The police and ambulance were gone but on standby over the phone. They had to do their jobs rather than waiting on me. I arrived in panic I frantically opened my door to find him unconscious on our couch. I immediately ran to him to terrified to check his breathing, and the temperature of his skin, because he looked dead. My mother came inside, and seen me panicing. I screamed in demand for an ambulance over the phone in panic, upset that they didn't break our door down. He wasn't hardly breathing matter of a fact if he was it was so light I couldn't feel/see/or hear it. I opened his eyes and I couldn't even see anything but the white part. He was overdosing, he was dying. I kept screaming at him. Healing over him, telling him to wake up. I slapped him on his face, and kept shaking him hoping that he could at least hear me, or feel me and it would keep him alive. He hardly had a pulse. I was a mess, I was crying, I was so scared. I got up a minute not wanting him to get in trouble so I hid his rig in the floor and spoon. When the ambulance pulled up and the police i looked through his phone to find out what he had last bought and over dosed on. i told them from what i researched it was morphine, xanax, crack, and heroin. They pulled me away from him, and put me outside, because was freaking out. They gave him a shot and whenever they took him out he was awake, but he was upset and freaking out questioning what I had done. He looked like death walking out the door, he was so weightless, pale, skinny, and sick looking in the face. They took him away the ambulance. When he made it back he said they pumped his stomach, They made him swallow coal. He had the runs, and was upset he was shitting disgusting black stuff. I had changed his number and deleted all of his text messages, and drug connection phone numbers. He was already pissed off, and when he seen that he broke everything in our apartment. Went to our room away from me, and **** slammed the door. Thirty minutes later he came out told me to get in the truck. It was daylight. We pulled up infront of a property he stole 900.00 worth of equipment, sold it within two hours, and went and bought us morphine 100s. Posted: 04/23/2014 1:09 AM Received 2 Thanks for this Post

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