Confessions

 Hello everyone,

Its been awhile since I've been here but with addiction no longer a major issue in my life it is easy to turn my thoughts and energy else where and I am very grateful for that. 

Things are going well for my daughter and son in law (H addict for those of you who don't know) and all of our lives are "normal" for the time being.  They are both working full time and relieved that school is out for the summer.  I don't know if I ever told everyone that my (youngest, married to the addict)daughter went back to school for her Masters.  Her thinking is that seeings how hubby is studying in all his spare time she might as well too and they should both be done about the same time.  He lost a couple of years to active addiction and is playing catch up.  I am very proud of them both.

While catching up on here I was glad to read in one of Martys posts that she doesn't talk about addiction with her daughter.  I never do either and I was wondering if it was just me or if it was a normal thing for families with addicts in recovery.  He was always very willing to answer any questions I might have had but the more time that passes the more I put it behind me.  Isn't that what we're suppossed to do?  After all...how can someone more forward if they are always reminded of the past.  Anyways as far as that part of my life things are good.  I am even hoping that someday I might even have some grandkids.  Of course that brings up a whole new set of issues dealing with addiction and I remind myself to take things one day at a time.  Funny how after being thrown into the addiction world that "one day at a time" seems to be everyones motto.

Some of you may remember my telling you of a tenant we once had who is an addict.  Stopped by when we were cleaning a place he used to live in and told us he now had 8 yrs of recovery under his belt and thanked us for helping him though we really didn't know what we had done other than treat him decently... Well....we were cleaning the same place again and he once again stopped by (he lives down the street and saw our car).  He is getting married in June and invited us to the wedding!  I am very happy for him.  As so many addicts do, he had such a self-inflicted disfunctional life at one time, lost a wife to a cocaine induced heart attack at 40, lost a son to drunk driving (the kid was driving) it is nice to see him doing so well now with 10+ years of sobriety. 

On another front...many of you know I have/had many addicts of one sort or another waltz through my life.  Some of them are relatives that do a continual dance but I try to keep my distance.  Not always so easy...seems like an in law who we sold a place to has developed some sort of problem...not really sure yet what it is.  We just had to repo a place from him that he had not made a payment on for 9 months...came to find out he had not paid the taxes nor had insurance on the place either.  There is definately some kind of problem here...we are thinking maybe gambling.  I know he is a heavy pot smoker but he has done that forever.  He is acting like a typical addict...evasive, decietful, avoiding us, always blaming someone else for his lack of $$.  He hasn't admitted to us what the problem is but he gave us no problems with the forclosure and signed the property back willingly...after he had keep the rent from the tenants for 9 months and let the taxes and ins lapse.  So whatever.  He had taken on a roommate for a while who was known around town as a meth head but he gave him the boot.  I'm hoping there is not an addiction to drugs(besides pot) as well as gambling and hoping that he is able to save himself before he looses everything.  He has been here before 30 years ago and saved himself so we are hoping he can do it again before too much damage is done.  This man is 57 years old and at one time owned a very profitable aircraft repair business.  Just goes to show that addiction can rear its head at anytime and that it isn't always substances that is the problem.

Anyways, just wanted to check in while I had the time and was in the mood.  Congrats to those addicts and families who are doing well and for those addicts and families of addicts who are not doing so well hang in there and don't give up hope.  Take care of yourselves because in the end it really is all anyone can do. We all know than an addict has to save themself.  Hugs to you all.

Sorry to be so long winded but just felt like blabbin I guess.

Posted: 05/20/2014 12:36 PM

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