Confessions

Lil girl has been sick. My new job that I need is not going well, the woman I work with are mean beyond belief. Nowhere to hide from them either. The kinder I am the worse it gets. Including my supervisor, just a mess. Things around my house Re breaking left n right. Hubby working overtime and cranky. Missing my AD terribly bad. My car is needing repair and she is over 3 hours from me. My nalaxone kits wee going fast and now no more. Need to work on the police dept carrying them, but there seems to be no time right now. I just feel so disgusted and having a hard to e with an attitude of gratitude right now. On my pity pot I guess. It is just the more I try to Change me, the more things around me are still the same....just tired of life I guess.

Lil girl has been sick. My new job that I need is not going well, the woman I work with are mean beyond belief. Nowhere to hide from them either. The kinder I am the worse it gets. Including my supervisor, just a mess. Things around my house Re breaking left n right. Hubby working overtime and cranky. Missing my AD terribly bad. My car is needing repair and she is over 3 hours from me. My nalaxone kits wee going fast and now no more. Need to work on the police dept carrying them, but there seems to be no time right now. I just feel so disgusted and having a hard to e with an attitude of gratitude right now. On my pity pot I guess. It is just the more I try to Change me, the more things around me are still the same....just tired of life I guess.

I had a very vivid dream last night that you came back home. You were happy and you had that white blond hair you had as a child. We all hugged you and we were a happy, whole family again. Then I woke up and remembered you were in jail again. Life sucks sometimes... Hi all! Just checking in. I have been off for a while. I decided to be very busy. We are building a new house and it is almost finished. We are moving Oct 13 so life is very hectic. I am also working on a project with a few others to get educational materials to remote areas of Kenya on the prevention and containment of Ebola. We have a friend there who is traveling village to village to meet with people who are isolated and unable to get clear information and news. It is very rewarding and it keeps my mind occupied. AD is presently in jail. He has a court date Oct 9. He called once to say he would probably be in county lock-up for a year. But that is what he always says. This could have been cleared up long ago but he kept skipping out on court dates. He tried to get us to post bond but we did not..at least in there he is not drinking and using. It is a waiting game now and I kind of hope they do keep him there at least through the winter. It would be a relief, knowing he had food & shelter such as it is.

I have several health issues that require me to get pain meds from my doctor. I use them as prescribed. It has gotten to the point that my doctor and my family thinks I am addicted to pain medication. I don't take pain medication everyday.... Only when medically necessary. Feeling frustrated.

Thanks to a dear friend im feeling alot better , she provided me with meds and insulin , in which is getting me trough til oct 15 th when i get paid ,it was a God sent . Bless her heart.

God Bless

Dog

Been without my meds almost 2 weeks , no insulin,no ride to the the doctor needless to say got to make it to parole every week its far from where im at and they dont give a **** how you make it there , they know my situation and they dont care , better be there or violate, and go back to prison , when is this **** going to end . And yes im trying everything wont have any money till oct 15th .And no one out here to help me.But still keeping my insanity, but very stressed out , in need of my blood pressure medicine , transportation is getting to b a big problem , got to go

Dog the addict

Well not homeless anymore got an apartment its bare but its mine sleep on the floor but its mine i have a lamp and am-fm radio , im moving up conidering i just gou out . The Lord is good.

God bless u all

Dog the Addict

I have lived in my current place for about three years but actually don't know my neighbors very well except for the ones to my north. The wife told me that the people next to her on the other side were getting a divorce, were bringing up their daughter's son since his birth about ten years ago and, most recently, that the grandmother and the boy were living in the house instead of the grandfather and the boy. The boy's mother had returned to live with her father and son before the father moved out. BUT NOW her mother kicked her out, and she is living in her car in front of the house, apparently for some time. To get to the point, at about 3:00 a.m, I was up at the front of my house where the windows were open. I heard the daughter crying and sobbing, "let me into the house." She had a terrible cough, too. This went on for about a half hour, and I have not been able to sleep since. I woke up my husband and asked him what we should do. He said, "if her own mother won't let her into the house" then we should not either. This surprised me because his attitude with our son is so different. The problem for our son is addiction and the neighbor's daughter is said to be the same. She has beaucoup tattoos, probably all over her body. I have actually never spoken to her and to her grandmother only about twice. STILL my instincts were to open my door and at least let her use the toilet, give her a warm drink and a blanket. I was reviewing my inventory. Sleeping bag? I did not do anything because my husband didn't support the idea and also because of all the things I have read here and elsewhere about co-dependency. It is hard to stay the course. I keep thinking if human charity did not extend to this girl, if I failed to love this neighbor, then I was not living up to my ideals about what people should be and do for each other. Also, she was in pain and I can't stand to see any human or animal in pain. I am a pacifist who gets upset with the nightly news. So, not having done anything, I am now as awake and alert as can be. Is this girl reaching her bottom or can it be hoped that she is? I imagine myself in her place and get so anxious. I also imagine myself in her mother's place being pissed off at me for a temporary rescue when the girl needs to rescue herself. Am I doing the right thing? What if she is dying? Should I get dressed and take her to a hospital? Call the police and let them do that? I am probably going to mind my own business and do nothing but I am worried and guilty.

Hello  my friends

Im free just got out yesterday , and homeless ,attempting to locate a shelter , slept at a hotel, but my feet are ripped and bleeding from all the walking i had to do with my prison boots . Its to much to tell , im at the libary at this time . will wrte to u guys later , got holder and fat all that good prison food .

God Bless u all

 

My son got paid today and is high as a kite and broke already..........

I'm okay. Had no expectations for today.